on becoming a person
I had not planned on writing today as I am leaving for England this evening. But events made me want to write and borrow the title of one of Carl Rogers greatest works. I think it apropriate somehow to my situat
ion. I am a person who has struggled with standing up for myself all my life. Well actually since my teenage years when I was bullied severely. Lately I was doing a lot better and then when you have a slight fall back it seems to hit you even harder. Especially since as a coach/counselor myself I know exactly what I am doing wrong and what I want to do different. That makes me angry at myself and that makes it even worse.
Holidays are occasions that can drive my stress level through the red. I feel responsible for everybody around me having fun and that way I do end up being the only one not having funn. And I am sick and tired of that. Had a good wake up call last night, no need to get into details. So I am making a resolution:
1. I am going to start every day with a meditation and grounding exercises. So I am strong and powerfull.
2. I will use affirmations, inner child work and focussing to keep myself strong.
3. I will not panic or be angry at myself if I relapse or do get a headache. I am going to be nice for myself because my body is telling me that is what it wants from me.
4. I am going to have FUN. I hope the others have fun as well and I will try to see they have as well but not to the degree that it hurts ME.
I hope to finish this book today. It is in dutch by Suzanna Unck. A former therapist of mine. I recently found out that she has done the same training as I have. I haven't been to see her for a few years as she moved to another part of the country. But reading the book is also an eye opener. The book is like a
diary and she dares to openly talk about her own struggles and joys of being highly sensitive, and she writes about the days that are not that great for her. When she falls back and has off days. I have always said that when I start the practice I don't want my clients to see my private details, no details about my life. But why not? I am not going to be helping people with severe psychiatric illnesses but people who strugle with the little things in life just like I do. So why can't they see who I am on a good and a bad day? If they see how I deal with my bad days and how I try to learn from them and move on isn't that a good thing? I am beginning to think so and it is changing my outlook on a lot of things. I want to start living truely as who I am. With the good parts and the bad parts. And if others don't like it, it is their problem. If they leave me over it, they were not friends to begin with. But you know, the fear of losing friends because I am not good enough is in my head. It is time I faced it instead of running away all the time. Running makes you tired.
" There is nothing to fear but fear itself"
ion. I am a person who has struggled with standing up for myself all my life. Well actually since my teenage years when I was bullied severely. Lately I was doing a lot better and then when you have a slight fall back it seems to hit you even harder. Especially since as a coach/counselor myself I know exactly what I am doing wrong and what I want to do different. That makes me angry at myself and that makes it even worse.Holidays are occasions that can drive my stress level through the red. I feel responsible for everybody around me having fun and that way I do end up being the only one not having funn. And I am sick and tired of that. Had a good wake up call last night, no need to get into details. So I am making a resolution:
1. I am going to start every day with a meditation and grounding exercises. So I am strong and powerfull.
2. I will use affirmations, inner child work and focussing to keep myself strong.
3. I will not panic or be angry at myself if I relapse or do get a headache. I am going to be nice for myself because my body is telling me that is what it wants from me.
4. I am going to have FUN. I hope the others have fun as well and I will try to see they have as well but not to the degree that it hurts ME.
I hope to finish this book today. It is in dutch by Suzanna Unck. A former therapist of mine. I recently found out that she has done the same training as I have. I haven't been to see her for a few years as she moved to another part of the country. But reading the book is also an eye opener. The book is like a
diary and she dares to openly talk about her own struggles and joys of being highly sensitive, and she writes about the days that are not that great for her. When she falls back and has off days. I have always said that when I start the practice I don't want my clients to see my private details, no details about my life. But why not? I am not going to be helping people with severe psychiatric illnesses but people who strugle with the little things in life just like I do. So why can't they see who I am on a good and a bad day? If they see how I deal with my bad days and how I try to learn from them and move on isn't that a good thing? I am beginning to think so and it is changing my outlook on a lot of things. I want to start living truely as who I am. With the good parts and the bad parts. And if others don't like it, it is their problem. If they leave me over it, they were not friends to begin with. But you know, the fear of losing friends because I am not good enough is in my head. It is time I faced it instead of running away all the time. Running makes you tired." There is nothing to fear but fear itself"
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